• Rhyena Halpern

Top Ten Questions You Need to Answer if You Will Ever Die



This is not a story about my hospice patient with advanced Parkinson’s and how over the year I have seen her every Thursday as a volunteer, she has given me the most meaningful encounter with grace that I have every known.


This is not a story about leading Advanced Directive workshops and hearing from people in their 80’s who desperately want their wishes for their death known, but are stymied when it comes to actually committing it to paper.


This is not about how much I want to have a good death so my loved ones can move on easily and so I am motivated to make sure my wishes are clear if I am no longer be able to speak for yourself.


This essay is a loving push to remind you that you will die. No one, not even you, gets out of here alive.Good news! There is one thing you can do: Prepare for its inevitability.


Let yourself embrace this reality. Let yourself step to death’s side for just a minute. Put down the fear for a moment.Can we pause together and breathe deeply?


Consider this scenario: you are lying in bed and your death is imminent. Then ask yourself these questions. You can write the answers, think them, say them aloud.


1. Who would you want at your side?


2. Is it important to you to die at home?


3. Who do you have unfinished business with?


4. Would you want to live even if it meant being hooked up to a machine?


5. How important to you is it to be free of pain?


6. Do you have a will and trust? Are your financial affairs in order?


7. Are you leaving a lot of stuff at your home for your loved ones to sort through?


8. Do you have special things that you want to pass on to your special peeps?


9. Do you want a funeral or memorial service or something else?


10. What else is important to you to note?


Think about it. Ponder it. Turn it over.


Let me know if you want to talk about it. Feel free to reach out to rhyhalpern@thirdactcoaching.org or click here for more information.


Death And Dying Consciousness Hospice End Of Life Relationships

Third Act Coaching

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office: San Francisco Bay Area       rhyhalpern@thirdactcoaching.org

www.thirdactcoaching.org

(650) 517-3850